Thoughts of a Pornstar
by Dana-Eliza
Summary: A few pornstars grant us a look inside their brain while recording their latest film. This is what they think during the movie. Yaoi, language and trying to give a funny side to the porn industry! Several male characters will show up!
1. Deidara, the unprofessional

I don't really know what happened here, but I had a lot of fun actually writing this. I'm pretty sure this is not how it goes in real life, but imagining it happens like this is way better. Sorry for any pornstar that feels insulted by this. I think you are doing a great job and I am aware that most movies are done at a much more professional level. Keep up the great work!

Now enjoy!

...

Acting itself is of course already a pretty interesting concept. What do they think while playing out their scenes? And more importantly what do porn stars think about when acting out their scenes? Deidara has been in the business for a while now and has done all sorts of movies, adult movies to be exact. Today he has agreed on having us take a look inside his mind while working and it came out with some pretty interesting dialogues.

_Well, here we go again and the room is way too bright. Yes, they need to be able to see me in the camera, but damn, this blinds everyone around. And who decorated this room? For god's sake, I understand people don't care about that while watching, but this is absurd. What kind of theme are we going with here? Cosy meets garbage belt? _

_Stop it with the touch ups already! There is enough make-up on my damn face. Leave me alone, woman. No, get that brush away from me, no!_

_Yeah, yeah, getting on the bed. Casually flip through a magazine as if this is the normal place for you to read a magazine. Why would I use the chair to the side? No one sits in chairs nowadays. It's all about the beds. The king-sized beds obviously. _

_What was I today again? I'm sure no woman would show up, but was I bottom or top? Oh, the guy is coming in, let's take a… Oh, for god's sake. This guy is freaking huge! Okay, bottom, but am I so certain I still want this? What the hell would he be rocking in his pants? Oh my god, I need to check my contracts before I sign them! Don't just think about the money, Dei. This is what happens then! What is this guy? Like ten feet tall?_

_Kissy kissy kissy and there goes the tongue out of my mouth all over my face. _

_Do I really want to take this guy's pants off? Stop giving me the evil eye, director! I'll take his fucking pants off now! And maybe use his belt as a whip and smack yo ass! And then get fired. Okay, don't do that, Dei. Keep it cool. It's fine. We'll get through this. We have been through much worse things than this!_

_Stop slapping me with it! Dude, seriously? Stop it. What are you doing? That is not what you're supposed to do with it. This is not tempting me in any way to start sucking it. Stop slapping me. Dude! Goddamnit!_

_And I'm choking. _

_My hair! Damn it watch the hair! I know it's long and it's a bitch to take care off, but don't rip it out of my skull, damn it! _

_Did I miss my waxing appointment?! No, no I went last Thursday. There is no hair down there. I'm good, I'm good. No need to worry. Maybe I should ask Sasori about that lasering thing already. So much easier than getting waxed and it doesn't hurt as much either. Yes, I should do that. Oh, and there goes the third finger._

_Okay and there we go… Damn, he really is kind of big, isn't he? It's okay, just take in a deep breath and then let out some groans. It will please the director. Now close your eyes and push your head back in the pillow. It will look sexy. Yes, good job, co-worker. Moan along. Yay for teamwork. _

_Yes, yes. This feels kind of nice. Just keep up with this pace. No, don't! Jesus fucking shit, mother of… Just bite your lip, Dei. Bite it before you scream too loud and it's not sexy anymore. Why did he have to thrust so hard? Because of the damn director, that's why! That little bitch. _

_Is this a good side of me? Am I flaunting the right stuff? Oh, leg must go up higher. To where?! On his shoulder?! You know how big this guy is? Okay, fine fine. I'll freaking try. This really hurts my muscles, man. _

_Seriously, who decorated this room? Why is there a big ass cactus in the corner? This doesn't make any sense at all. And why do we have a make-up table over there? What is the plot of this movie anyway? Don't tell my wife, but I want you to fuck me hard? That would actually be a logical explanation, though it does mean me and my have seriously terrible taste in, everything. _

_Yeah, right there, colleague. That's the spot. Fuck yeah. I am moaning for real now. You are doing a great job. I should remember this for later on. No wait, no sex with colleagues. Only causes messes, remember? We want no drama. So just fuck me good now, man. Just do it now. Yes, yes… _

_Why is the door opening? And who is this other huge dude? Oh my god, it's a threesome and I am the middle person? Deidara, damn it, check your contracts before you sign them! _

_At least these guys are kissing me, so that's nice. Wait a minute. What is this guy doing behind me…? Oh god, here it comes. This other dude is even bigger than the one before and he is not taking a moment to breathe at all… _

_Get on your hands and knees and get stuffed from both sides! Yes, director, sir!_

_And now I am in his lap. Yes, that is indeed my dick, dear colleague. I know it's an odd thing, because you have been avoiding it this entire time, but now it's your job to make me come. I know this is a hard thing to do, but you've fucked me pretty hard, so it's your turn now. So put your lips around it and suck it while this other dude keeps fucking me and then I'll freaking come! The director is giving you the evil eye. He'll use your belt as a whip, I can guarantee this. Now suck it already!_

_Moan, moan, shiver, grunt, cry, moan some more. Yeah… yeah, almost there… _

_God, I am exhausted… I must look really awful. My face is flushed and swollen and there is drool everywhere. I cannot stuff two dicks into my mouth at the same time! _

_Open your mouth and wait for it… Yes, stick your tongue out. Their moans are getting louder. Almost done now. Yes, you can do it. And, it's in my eye. _

_Well, now that's over with, I made a butt load of money again. Hehehe, butt load. _

_Wait, who the hell is that guy and this one and what's happening? A pool? Outside? Now? What's going on? Oh, no…_

_Damn it, Dei, read your contracts before you sign them already!_

…

Characters © Masashi Kishimoto

Let me know what you think!


	2. Sasori, the superior

Because it was time for another crack fic and this first chapter seemed to have been liked, I am going to continue this! A new character every chapter!

Thank you for the reviews and enjoy this one!

...

After the interesting results of the last experiment that we have decided it would be a good idea to see how other actors deal with the industry. The next one up in line is a recommendation of Deidara. A friend of his. One who has been in the industry even longer than the previous actor. He has seen some very interesting things or at least we expect this. Sasori does have a certain genre which peeked our interest.

_Wrong wrong wrong. It's all wrong. Who in the world put this together? This is not how it's supposed to look like. Must be one of those stupid intern brats they hire around here. How dare they have them mess with this beauty? The straps are not supposed to go this way. How would they keep a man contained if they could simply be ripped off? This is not going to be believable on screen. Amateurs. _

_Where is this star they were talking about anyway? I should be honoured to be working with him? The asshole didn't even show up yet and I want to start this shit already. He should be honoured to be working with me. I have created such beautiful things, but what do they see? Simple equipment they can use. They don't see what it can be. It's truly a piece of art. Never will its magnificence fade. But apparently this co-worker of mine will never see it if he keeps me waiting any longer. Or I can simply use it against him…_

_And there is mister hot stuff who doesn't need to be on time. Oh yes, indeed that is a whip. A very very long whip. And I do know how to use it properly. Yes, let the fear creep up into your eyes. But remember, you can't lose the hard on between your legs. It needs to stay up for the viewers. _

_Hurry up? Don't tell me to hurry up. I am your senior, director man. And this needs to be done right. First one strap tightly over the wrist. Stop complaining co-worker. Your rights were taking away as soon as you were late. And yes, there are many more straps that need to be fastened. I am indeed also still wearing the whip on my belt. Fear not, it will be put to good use. _

_Such beauty… a trembling body strapped tightly into the structure. Legs spread, arms spread. Small strips of leather covering only certain parts of him. It's truly a work of art. Nothing can compete with this. Eternal beauty. _

_Stop frowning? What kind of direction is that? How dare they question my methods? This is how someone is supposed to work this scene. This leather outfit makes me the leader of this movie. I am the one in control. I will play this out the way I wish to. Frowning is part of this when I am forced to hurry through my admiring his body. I do not wish to touch him yet. The moment doesn't ask for it. Why do I work with such amateurs?!_

_Not hit him, but pretend you're hitting him? No, this is not how I work. I will whip his ass and he will cry out in pain. I do not pretend. This man wanted to do this movie, then I will do it the right way. Stop complaining, amateur!_

_What if I would attach another pole to the top part and then tie his hands there. Then his feet could go into the arm straps, making his ass pop out perfectly. This really could be an improvement. So much could be done with this. Expand its glory. Yes, yes. I am touching it. Stop complaining. This orgasm will come soon enough, I promise. Now, which strap could I move as well?_

_Such demanding people. Why does a porn movie always need to revolve around sex? Could it not be done without? Yes, pants are coming off. Do not rush me, director man! Nakedness will be achieved in due time. _

_Being hairless down there really looks much nicer. This man should be aware of this already. I am not pleased with my nakedness now touching his nakedness. How do they expect me to stay turned on like this? Wait, I have not been turned on in the first place. These people do not know how to make a movie erotic. All rushing through it as if they need to be somewhere else already. Perfection takes time. Amateurs._

_Moan? I do not moan, dear sir. It is my selling point. Now kissing as well? I do not wish to touch this man further. _

_I still do not understand how this man is such a star. Everything he does is such a cliché. Doesn't he have any tricks up his sleeve? Actually satisfy me? This is such a waste of time. _

_Okay, yes, yes… No, no absolutely not. Why? Why do you not understand what you need to do right now? Even the director is astonished by your incompetence. Okay, he should be astonished, but he is too blind to see what he is supposed to do. This man should try and play in one of his own movies first and then comment on what we are doing. I am the expert. I should be making this movie instead. My whip would come to good use then. _

_Just come already. This shaking mess is cute and all, but I am barely touching you and you are way overdoing this. Could you just not? _

_Finally finished. Good job, brats. Way to make a mediocre movie once more and now let's pray it will sell, so we get paid. _

_What have you done to my invention? Have you people seriously lost it? This is… no. I can't even look at it. Barbarians! You will all be added to my list of people I will not work with anymore. You will all be blacklisted!_

_Amateurs!_

Characters © Masashi Kishimoto

Let me know what you think!


	3. Hidan, the enthusiast

Let is continue this weirdness! I like this chapter, so this might mean it's not funny. I don't know.

Warnings: This is Hidan, you know what that means.

Enjoy!

...

Since we started this research a lot of people have shown interest in the outcome of this. Since we need to make the best of this and need to know what it is exactly what porn actors think while they are working, we need to do a lot of tests. To make this as trustworthy as possible. Today we have a very interesting figure. He is very excited to be part of this investigation and we are therefore very interested in seeing what goes on in his mind. Now let's meet Hidan.

_Alright, another fucking day. This is going to be great. Best day ever. I am going to show them that I am the best at this. So pumped up right now. Where is the other fucker at? Oh, already laid out by the pool? Fantastic. I like pools. _

_What do you mean I wasn't supposed to throw him in? Why are we here at this shitting pool then anyway? People are going to get thrown in! I don't care about his fucking hair! If you didn't see this coming, then you really are a fucking asshole, just saying. I think this is funny. Yes, I see that my co-worker is not very happy anymore, but hey, I am going to fuck him, so I'll cheer him up in no time! We're good!_

_This hair is all sticky now… Can't someone dry this shit? Why does this dude have such long hair anyway? My fault?! Oh, right. Still there is a pool and people are supposed to be in it! This is why there is a pool in the first place!_

_Oh yeah, you like that, huh? Yeah, suck it. Hey, you're pretty good at this. Maybe I should ask you out? Well, not ask you out. More like fuck you on another day without cameras. Who on earth wants to date someone when you can have sex with everyone! Am I right? Yeah man, fuck all the people! High five! No high five? What, director? Oh, shit. Yes, sorry sorry. Yeah, suck that dick. You know you like it, you little slut. Yeahhh. _

_Break time! What's on the fucking menu today? Some protein? Such a bore my co-worker is… That was funny! Totally funny! Because cum is protein and shit. Right? Is that wrong? I don't know. Like I give a shit. He should've laughed! Damn this moody guy. He better be more enjoyable when I fuck him. _

_Wow, you shave quite nicely. I like the little star. How did you do that anyway? Fucking effort. Just get it waxed, man. All the hair gone and a little pain never hurt anyone. Pain is great. Don't do some weak ass shaving. Idiot. Still it's a nice touch the little star. Seriously, did he use like a stamp or something? Is that possible? I wonder if one of the viewers would even appreciate this little star. _

_Oh, slap that ass. Yes, nice and firm ass. Great ass. Woo. Okay, let's do something else now. _

_Hey, hey. Did you see there is a fucking mirror there? Holy shit, seriously? Awesome. Oh, I look great. Yeah, see me riding that ass. Wow, this is… Yeah, I like this. Sure, you look great too, but look at me, man. My hips snapping forward, my big thick… Huh? Yeah, whatever, man. Just look at this mirror, fantastic._

_Okay, hold up. Why is there even a mirror? This is by a pool? Like it's attached to the fence, randomly. Who came up with this? I mean this is awesome. I want to know who the architect is. This fucker should come do my house as well and come up with these great ideas. Amazing. Wow. Prayers to you, man, seriously. _

_We can now finally go into the pool? You're fucking serious. Fucking finally! Yeah._

_Stop complaining. I only pushed him in a little bit. Ah, man. It's funny. He's wet and almost drowning and shit. Whatever. I think it's funny. _

_Weeee, I'm going to splash you wet. _

_Yes, get your ass over there. I want to fuck you from behind in the water and have all the water move around us in this beautiful rhythm. See I can be fucking romantic. Yeah, man. Let's continue this. Great. Okay, moving on now._

_This ledge is a little rough, huh? Maybe like… I don't fucking know. Don't lean on it? Shit, I need to keep on fucking you anyway, so get through it. Your ass might be hurting too and I don't see you complaining about that. Oh, but that's because I am just that good, right? Yeah, you like me fucking you. Yeah, I know you do. We're going fuck again soon. Like tomorrow. I'll call you. Yeah. And you're going to say yes and then we'll fuck. I'm so romantic. _

_Oh, oh, it's coming. Yeah, keep on sucking it. Just swallow that pool water. Yeah, fuck man. You're excellent at this. Ah, yeah. Fuck. Ah. _

_No one is looking at me… Coast is clear. Everyone focused on the material they just recorded. Not focused on me. Perfect. Fucking perfect. No one will notice me stealing this mirror right now. Carefully cut it off. Snip snip. _

_Shit man! That's seven years of bad luck, you fucking asshole. Don't scare me like that! What the shit were you even thinking? What? I was not stealing it. I was just… going to clean it? Is that a good excuse? Yes, just go with it._

_Aw man, from my pay check? Fuck. _

_..._

Characters © Masashi Kishimoto

Let me know what you think!

*whispers* Vote for my poll

Love, Dana


	4. Naruto, the first timer

I know that I have not done all the Akatsuki characters, but I just really wanted to do this one! This is how I think Naruto would handle it, since his emotions are always all over the place anyway :D

Enjoy!

...

Having worked quite closely with the adult business company for the past few weeks, they recommended coming over for this special shooting they would be doing today. It was very interesting to meet this young fellow who seemed to be ready for today. After a nice talk with the guy we found out this will actually be his very first time shooting an adult film and this made us extra curious. How does one roll into this business and what are his motivations to even start? This will be a great asset to our research. Naruto gladly granted us access to his thoughts while filming.

_This is going to be easy. That idiot had no idea what he was talking about, always whining about what this job entails and stuff. Sasuke is such a cry baby. What could possibly be not fun about this? You have sex, get to work with nice people… Nothing seemed off about this. Stupid Sasuke and his stupid lies. I will get through this easily. _

_Ooh, I look fantastic. Look at me. Guys, seriously. I am impressed with myself. How could someone not want me know. Am I right? No? You guys are no fun. _

_Roleplaying. I can do that. Just act like I am some kind of bad thug and then get in touch with a police officer. This should be great. Me showing the police what I am made off. They never saw me coming. Get it? _

_What do you mean the cops are coming after me? I thought I would be the one to… No, seriously? Also wait, hold on a second. I feel like I am missing something here. There is one of me and there are… three police officers… Are they like stand ins? _

_THREE!_

_No, I am not coming out of this bathroom! I am not going. No. There are three men out there. No. I am not doing it. Sasuke can go screw himself. He should've warned me. There are three dicks out there. Three. _

_Okay, I am out on the street, stealing a car. You can do this, Naruto! Don't show them you are scared! They can smell fear! And this will be really easy. Just stick this thing between the window and act as if you have a clue on what you are really doing. They will simply press a button anyway that will actually unlock the door. You're not doing anything. Car alarm! Oh, wait I knew that. Here come the officers. Start running and let them catch up!_

_So much eyebrows… Why does this man have this much hair right above his eyes? It's like he has pubic hair on his face… Wait, what was my line again? _

_And now I am handcuffed and will be punished. Sasuke will pay for setting me up like this!_

_Wait, what are you doing? Why are you taking off your belt? Oh no, nonono. _

_GET THAT THING AWAY FROM ME!_

_I'm sorry I screamed at you, but I really don't want your dick in my face. Let's see how happy you are when you have my dick in your face, asshole! Speaking of which. What the hell are you doing back there! Get away from it. No! Don't touch it!_

_AAAAH!_

_Okay, I am sucking a dick. Sucking a dick. Suck suck suck. Sucking two dicks?! Sucking two dicks. Drooling all over the floor below, because my mouth can't fit two dicks! Idiots. _

_Ah oh…_

_Oh god, I really thought I was the one topping… Calling me bottom material does not really help me out here, director mister. I'm still not sure if I am happy with this dick inside of me, though at least he's nice about it. Can't say the same about you director mister. Maybe you should be in my place instead. _

_They do switch places often, don't they? And I'm just here, pressed onto a car, which is really not comfortable and get one dick after another inside my ass. And why do they need to keep those dicks in my face? Get them away from me, man. This is not cool. That thing has been inside of my ass. You really think I enjoy having it here then? _

_Huh? Was that a compliment? I am pretty much just lying here, trying to not focus too much on their switching habits. Better to just give in and let them have their way or something. I have been moaning?! Since when? And I am hard?! Huh… I guess I do enjoy this then. Though those eyebrows are still weird. _

_Will people honestly believe we are supposedly out in the open while I get fucked on top of a car? Like this is not even really outside. We are in some kind of big hall, staged to look like we're outside. It all seems so fake. What kind of fake ass graffiti is that anyway? And will people really enjoy seeing me get fucked like this by three cop dudes? Do people dream of getting fucked by three cops? I certainly won't ever again. I mean, I certainly never did that… Yes, that's what I meant. _

_Oh, it's almost over? Turn around? Why? No! Don't aim all three dicks at me! I don't want to put my hands down! _

_That's not funny! Telling me I needed a facial… Stupid actors! _

_Ooh, showing parts of the movie. Ah, I look great, don't I? Look at me stealing that car. I so could do that in real life. I am just that cool. And I was not at all impressed by the three dicks. Pff, I could've handled way more than just three. This was easy. _

_Stupid Sasuke has nothing on me. I am a way better actor than he is. Idiot always complaining. _

_Oh, new contract. See, they liked me. Would I be okay participating in a gangbang? What's a gangbang? Ah whatever, should be alright. And sign._

Characters © Masashi Kishimoto

Let me know what you think!

Love, Dana


	5. Kakuzu, the one in charge

Since I mentioned the director quite frequently... Who might that director be?

Enjoy!

...

After thinking about it thoroughly, we realised we had missed a very important aspect. An adult film is not simply created with the focus on the actors. Many other people are involved in this process and a very important one is of course the director. After offering the director of the movies we have been part of so far more money, he agreed giving us a look in his brain as well. A behind the scenes shot, thoughts delivered from the one viewing every one of the movies first hand. Kakuzu.

_These people are never ready when I come in. My chair is not set into place, the camera is not rolling yet and the actors are not even ready on the bed. Not to mention my chair is not where it's supposed to be. Why should these people even get paid for what they do if they are not even doing it? That bonus is going into my pocket, that's for sure. _

_Oh, finally everyone is ready to get this thing started? Great. I applaud you. Lazy assholes. What kind of amateurs are they even? Don't they know how this all works? God, I once did all this shit as well and performed great. My movies are still the top selling ones, so show some respect, brats. _

_Is this guy afraid of dicks or something? Stick it in your fucking mouth or get out! I don't need this shit. Oh, oh. You're going to make that face at me?! It's caught on camera now and you're ruining film. Stick it in your mouth. I did a much better job when I was the actor. Are you for real right now? I don't want towards coming from your lips. I want something stuffed inside that pretty mouth of yours instead and only hear your sex sounds. No words, just sounds. Do it!_

_Why… why are you not doing your job right now? Why can't you just do stuff on your own and not wait on directions? You received a fucking script beforehand. Read it! _

_No one is getting paid until this damn movie is finished! Except for me._

_Goddamnit, he is going soft again. Arrange this. We hired people for this, so put them to work. I don't give a fuck if they are having lunch. Spray out their mouths and get them to work. This guy needs to be hard to be able to fuck someone. Why don't you people understand? Have you even ever had sex? God… I need to hire new people. Maybe a change in career. Maybe never work with people again. Maybe I should become a serial killer and then focus on everyone I worked with on this movie!_

_Finally we are getting to the sex. Obviously we couldn't have gotten here faster and now have to miss out on lunch ourselves. No one is eating until this shit is over. I am wasting my time as much as you guys are and you know whose fault it is? Yours! Get to fucking work and stick that dick in his ass. Your bottom is waiting on you, so what the fuck are you doing here chatting up the girl that is making your dick hard? _

_Okay, you got your dick inside of him, are doing your thing. Why am I not hearing any noises? Why are you not pretending you are enjoying this? Why do you think you get paid for delivering shit? I am in charge of that, asshole. Moan, groan, scream. Do fucking something or I will make you and it won't be done nicely. _

_How much money can I make out of this? The scene is a little mellow. No real kink, just a bit of ass play and with the way things now leak… We need to promote this thing heavily. At least we have one popular actor in here, though the one doing him as an amateur. We need to edit this shit as best as we can to make that guy look pretty. Such a waste of money. He's getting less than the rest. He doesn't deserve it. _

_Harder! Do it fucking harder! Even your co-star is asking you to go harder and here you are still going so slow. What are you doing, man? You're killing me! I will never do another movie with you, ever. You are not made for this job. You should just fuck off and get the hell out._

_How much money is it going to cost me before you finally come? Time is money, asshole! We are all waiting for you! Look, the fucking camera man is about to fall asleep! Do it already! God, really never going to hire another straight guy for a movie like this. It is not worth my time! This is too difficult. Why did he even come? Because he wanted money, well, if it's up to me, he ain't getting shit!_

_Yes! Oh, fuck yes! We are done?! Really? Oh god, finally. Fuckers get off the bed, let the cleaning crew get to work. I have another movie to shoot right now. Lazy assholes. You're not getting paid until this movie sells. Go fuck yourself!_

_Well, that went rather well I would say. I didn't get angry as often as I used to. These two were quite a nice team and we have a great movie on tape. A little editing and we're done. This should get enough money in and then I'm happy. Maybe I can then buy a bigger safe… That would be interesting. _

Characters © Masashi Kishimoto

Let me know what you think!


	6. Shikamaru, the lazy one

After investigating the director during our previous study we decided it would be better to focus again on the actors of the movies. Today we focus on an actor that doesn't get hired a lot and we'd like to find out why. What motivates the director to hire one more than the other? Are these certain talents or willingness some possess? Permission was granted to take a look inside Shikamaru's head.

_Obviously I am late when you force me to take public transportation. I know you are all rich enough to come pick us up with a car, but no, you rather safe money and let us go by very unreliable public transportation. You cannot blame me for my tardiness. This is your own fault and you know it, so stop glaring at me and put on that damn make-up. _

_Oh, you're done already? But I was enjoying whatever you were doing to my face. It was nice and relaxing. Can't we take another fifteen minutes? Don't we have all day for this anyway? Why is everyone in such a rush? Come on, let's get some food first and relax on the bed. I don't want to get into this all stressed out. Can't this lady give me a nice massage or something to relax the muscles? I think I deserve that after the bus ride I had towards this place. _

_Why did you just hit me? What do you mean it's not in your job description? This is so bothersome. Women, they really are a different species. Maybe that's why I prefer gay porn. At least the guy is never whining. _

_Yeah, yeah, I'm getting on the bed. Stop pushing me. I'm on the bed! See, lying down and everything. And I am not wearing boxers either to make this all a lot easier. See, I did think of this. I am ahead of you director. _

_Oh good, yes you kiss me. Good, I'll just lay here and then you can kiss me then. Yeah, you can stick your tongue down my throat. As long as you don't expect me to do much in return. We can do a great job together like that. You'll do all the work and I'll lie here. It's perfect. It's like making money while sleeping, except I'll have a dick in my ass. And I am sure my co-star will love doing all the work and just, you know, make use of me. I don't mind. It's fine. I'll just take a nap or something. This bed is really soft._

_Damn it, my plan was solid! I don't want to work. Honestly, why do you want me to move? He's all over me, so it's fine. I am hard! Okay, I am not. It's because I rather sleep now. _

_Troublesome…_

_Just stick it in my mouth. And then move a little back and forth. Yes, that's how it's supposed to go. This must look sexy. You're doing a good job and it looks like I am doing a good job. _

_Why is this director getting on my ass again?! Now I need to actually suck it and drool all over the place? What kinds of people actually watch these movies? Don't they prefer the laid back thing? I certainly do. Just lay there and let someone else do the work. And now I need to work?! Maybe I chose the wrong profession. Isn't there something that makes you rich while actually sleeping? This seemed the thing that came closest. _

_Thank you. I will then take a nap while you prepare me. Oooh, cold fingers! Couldn't you at least have warmed those up before you stuck them inside of me? And that tickles. Why are you moaning and taking them out again? We're not doing anything yet? I am the one feeling this, not you. Act normal man. So troublesome. _

_Holy fuck! A warning would've been nice, you asshole! Shit! _

_Yeah… yeah… oh, yeah… Great. Feels good… Moan moan, groan, gasp. _

_Not believable? Oh come on, man. I'm working hard there. He's going at it right now and I am doing my best to keep the same position on this bed and not flop over the side of it. He's seriously doing some pounding back there! Why are you complaining? Why is this sound making so important anyway?! And now I have to move too?! I don't want to move… Okay, fine. _

_On top?! Damn it, why are you doing this to me, man?! I can't be on top. I suck at being on top and I'm sure in my resume it says I don't get on top and ride a guy. They can fuck me all they like, but I don't want to work along. _

_Okay, time to come. Me first. Yeah, yeah, oh yeah. And done. Now your turn. What? Don't give me that look. I at least did what the guy asked me to do. Get on with it!_

_Ugh, you came all over my chest, man. It's sticky and disgusting. Can't you like not do that next time? So troublesome to wash it off again and now I have to shower. I already showered this morning. I don't want to waste time on showering. Just wipe it off or something. Ugh. _

_It seems everyone is gone now… Is the coast clear? Yeah, it's just me and you now, bed. I'm going to cuddle up into that soft duvet and let the feathers caress my skin. This is seriously heaven and I will not leave until it is morning. It's not like I am bothering anyone now anyway. They are all gone, moved on to the next set. This bed is done working and so am I!_

_Damn it, how did you find me?! Another job?_

_So troublesome…_

Characters © Masashi Kishimoto

Let me know what you think!

I still have 10 more characters planned! If you have any ideas for a character and I haven't planned them already, let me know!


	7. Neji, the high maintenance

I saw too late that Kakashi was requested twice... So next one will be Kakashi :D This one I just wanted to do personally XD I want to point out that I have a deep love for Neji and that this is totally OOC and mostly just fitting for how he looks, not how he acts ^^ Don't expect anything in character!

Enjoy!

...

Continuing the line of thought we had during our last study, we will today take a look inside the head of Neji. A porn-star that seems to be very good at his job, but for some reason doesn't get hired a lot. The word drama queen has been dropped quite a few times and we'd like to see if these accusations are true and what the effect is on Neji's work. Permission was granted by Neji to take a look inside at his thoughts today.

_Again no one could send a car to pick me up and I had to get myself here. If they won't bring me to the scene, then why aren't they paying me more money? It's not like they have extra expenses. These people have no idea how to treat their actors. I deserve a better treatment than this. Don't these people see that? _

_Really? You're making me wait now? I was here right on time and you're supposed to be ready for me. Yes, this is my annoyed face, bitch. Get out of the way and let me take a damn seat. It's your job to make me presentable, but I doubt you have any talents at all. Oh, you better not pick up that bottle of foundation. That is obviously not my colour and I will not go up there with a fake tanned face. _

_Don't touch the hair. _

_Why do these people insist on doing something with my hair? It's perfect as it is and no one knows how to handle it properly. They should keep their dirty fingers to themselves and bother with their own mess they call hair. _

_Finally ready. Make-up looks… proper and the hair is fabulous as always. My fingers can still slide through it. Yes, I am ready to go up and get on… the couch. Alright, I can work with that. They better have cleaned this properly, because I have seen this couch before. Black leather two sitter. Yeah, this is the standard couch that causes men to drool as soon as they see it. The obvious porn couch. How original. But I'll work with it. I'll rock that couch. I will make those men drool not because of the couch, but because I am on that damn thing. _

_Oh, that's my co-star? Alright, that's… unfortunate this happened to his face. I understand he was born with it, so it's even more unfortunate. But I guess it's not about the face, but about the thing between his legs. Hopefully that is better looking than his…_

_You want me to say that? Seriously? Who even wrote this script? Fine I will seduce him and then we can have sex. It is indeed very believable that I will get the job if I seduce my future boss and then I'll forever be the assistant he fucks. So original, again. Props to the script writer. _

_Did you just touch my hair? Don't you dare touch my hair again. I will hurt you!_

_Okay, I will climb into your lap and… kiss you. God, even his moans are creepy. Why can't I get the goodlooking co-stars? I know this director has enough of them on his list. I've seen his movies. And why am I getting the dirty look here? I am being professional here and try to kiss this guy, even if I really don't want to. It's not fair. They should be treating me far better than this. I am the star and definitely the one the people will be watching. Am I right?_

_Let's continue on now. Yeah, clothes gone and then we can just do something more. Oh, you're quite quick. Well, I don't mind that. Means we'll be done with this movie fast and then I can do some private things. Like take a very long shower and try to scrub this movie off my skin. _

_Did you just pull my hair?! Fuck you! Stop doing that, asshole!_

_Oh yes, touch me there. You are quite good at this. Now I understand why they hired your ass. Your fingers are very skilled and… yes, I do indeed like them a lot inside of me. Moving around and just… yes, that's the spot. Keep it going. _

_Yeah, I'll be your bitch. Come on, fuck me harder. Fuck, you're good, even if your face is ugly. Oh I'll moan for you, you dick. And will continue fucking your dick too. Shut up director, I don't want to stop now. Oh fuck you, pull my hair harder. Yeah, I'm your bitch. Harder, harder. Pull it, damn it. Yeah, you know what to do. I'll ride the shit out of you with your cock so far up my…_

_Really? You're done already? I was thinking you would last longer than this. And I was thinking highly of you until now. Right, the director is still complaining and wants this to end already, because this is going to be a long movie and we'll have sex multiple times. Wait, what? I was not aware of this! At least the sex is good, but let's not go overboard. You still aren't a very handsome man. _

_Yeah, I'm crawling on the desk and displaying myself, so this guy can come all over me. But something better still happen with my hard dick. This guy has been neglecting it ever since we started this. Wait where are you aiming that thing now. No, no. Don't moan now. No, this is not right. Dude, seriously point that thing in some other direction. This is not cool. Shit, director, say something! Dude, dude!_

_No, no, no! Not the hair, not the hair!_

_Fuck!_

...

Characters © Masashi Kishimoto

Let me know what you think!

Facebook page: Dana-Eliza, find the link on my profile. You can find updates on my stories, new story ideas and other things concerning me as an author on there. I would like it if you liked my page!

Love, Dana


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